Boy: Dad, dad, theres a spider in the bath. Dad: Whats wrong with that? Youve seen spiders before. Boy: Yes, but this one is three feet wide and using all the hot water!
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Popularity: 3% [?]
“The Boston taxi driver backed into the stationary fruit stall and within seconds he had a cop beside him. “”Name?”” “”Brendan OConnor.”” “”Same as mine. Where are you from?”” “”County Cork.”” “”Same as me……”” The policeman paused with his pen in the air. “”Hold “
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If necessity is the mother of invention, why does so much unnecessary stuff get invented?
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“A neutron walks into a bar. “”Id like a beer”” he says.The bartender promptly serves up a beer. “”How much will that be?”” asks the neutron. “”For you?”” replies the bartender, “”no charge”””
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“My birthdays comingDo you know what I need?”” “”Yeah, but how do you wrap a life?”””
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Q: Why will a blonde laugh at a joke three times?A: Once when you tell it, once when you tell her the punchline, and once when she gets it.
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One day an out of work mime is visiting the zoo and attemptsto earn some money as a street performer. Unfortunately, assoon as he starts to draw a crowd, a zoo keeper grabs him anddrags him into his office. The zoo-keeper explains to the mime that the zoo
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Jennifer: Are you coming to my party ?Sandra: No, I aint.Jennifer: Now, you know what Miss told us. Not aint. Its I am not coming, he is not coming, she is not coming, they are not coming. Sandra: Blimey, aint nobody coming ?
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Why couldnt the cow leave the farm? She was pasteurized!
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Q: WHY ARE BLONDES LIKE PIANOS?A: When they arent upright, theyre grand.
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